Gain Ground Today

What To Do When Your Life Is A Mess

One of the most common reasons that new clients come to me for coaching is because they feel that nothing is going right in their life and they feel like their life is totally out of control. This seems like a pretty extreme statement, but really it’s a much more common feeling than you might think.

Have you ever had this feeling? Do you have this feeling now? Well, I’m not sure about you, but I’ve felt like this plenty of times. I am here to tell you that if you’re feeling like this there is good news! First, you need to know that you are not alone. Most of us have these feelings from time to time, whether they are justified feelings or not. And secondly, I can tell you without a doubt that you do have the ability to turn your life around – from in the pits, to in the prime!

I find that there are two common frustrations that my clients experience when they have the “my life is a mess” feeling. The first is a feeling of being paralyzed and unable to move in their life. When this happens, the cause of the paralyzed feeling can usually be traced back to a negative mentality of feeling (and acting) like a constant failure. (Why should I try to make a change if I know it’s not going to work?)

The second common frustration that my clients experience when they feel like their life is a mess is the feeling of “I don’t know where to start”. This feeling usually leads to the thought process of, “since I don’t know where to start, I won’t start anywhere”. This is of course is a major cause of procrastination.

So, what can you do when you’re feeling like your life is a mess and you’re ready to take control? Here are six easy steps that you can follow when you’re ready to turn your life around.

Step 1: Identify the top ten “specific” things in your life that you are not satisfied with. Take the time to write these things down – it is essential that you get this list on paper!

Step 2: Prioritize your list. Start with the item on your list that you think making an improvement on would have the greatest positive impact on your life. Work your way down the list from one to ten.

Step 3: Associate “reasons” for improvement for each item on your list. Why is it imperative for you to make a change? How will this benefit you? What is the payoff? As I always say, if your reasons are strong enough, you can change or accomplish anything!

Step 4: Take the top three items on your list and create some action items for each. First, list one immediate action for each of these items. Come up with an action that you can commit to doing TODAY. Then, list three more actions that you can commit to accomplishing in at least the next five days. Now, BEGIN TAKING ACTION!

Step 5: Engage an accountability partner. Get at least one person on your side who can hold you accountable for completing your action items. Find somebody who understands the importance of your success and is willing to help keep you on track. (This is a great reason to hire a life coach!)

Step 6: After you’ve completed all of the assigned action items on the above list (five days or less), create new action items by repeating the same process. Create new action items for the first three items on your list, as well as for the next item on your list (the fourth item). Remember, you need both immediate action items (must be completed today) and five-day action items (must be completed within five days). Continue working through this process until you’ve reached the final item on your list.

Keys to success:
• Do not attempt to fix / change all ten things on your list at once. This can become overwhelming and may very well be the cause of your “mess” in the first place. It is essential that you prioritize and chunk out your actions.

• Keep your list and “reasons” in front of you whenever possible. Look at it as often as you can. Seeing your list is a great way to help keep you focused and on track.

• Don’t give up! If you stumble, don’t fall into the “I failed again” trap. Convince yourself that you have no choice but to keep going.

I truly hope that you find these to be valuable tips, and more importantly, I hope that you take action and follow-through. As you know by now, reading about techniques for making improvements is one thing, but it requires taking action to see results. Also remember, your past is only your past. Your past truly has no control over your future unless you allow it to take control of your future.

Make a fresh start today!

What To Do When Your Life Is A Mess

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